How important is communication in the bedroom?

How important is communication in the bedroom?
Extremely! All experts on marriage stress the
importance of communication between husband and
wife. Home finance, raising children, and furnishing a
house all call for free and open exchange of ideas
within the marriage. But communication in relationship
to sexual matters is so important that full
compatibility may be impossible without it!
A good marital sex life is based on trial and error and
a certain amount of experimentation. Although any
number of authors are willing and able to tell you
what works well for other people, no authority on
earth can tell you what works for you and your spouse.
You two are the only authority on this topic.
Effective communication on sexual matters involves
two primary ingredients: honesty and frankness. Never
fake an orgasm, or any other sexual response. If a
stroke, caress, or thrust is irritating or even painful —
say so. If the speed of an action is too slow or too fast,
make that known, also. And, most important of all,
when a particular activity is especially stimulating and
satisfying, communicate that fact as well.
Include all topics in your conversations on sex, such
as: first thing in the morning or last thing at night;
light on or light off; covered or uncovered; partly
clothed or totally nude.
Except in cases of pain or severe irritation, the best
time to discuss your sexual preferences may be after
and not during actual sexual intercourse. You should
have such a free sense of communication with your
spouse on sexual matters that you can talk frankly at
times other than while you are engaged in intimate
activities. The question “Was it as good for you as it
was for me?” has been devalued by it’s casual use in
TV and movie scripts, and in the popular press.
However, it is still an important question and should
be asked. If the answer is “no”, find out why not.
Above all else, covenant to be totally unselfish. The
satisfaction of giving pleasure to your spouse can be
very gratifying in itself. When both husband and wife
strive to remain unselfish, there will be enough give
and take on matters of preference to provide balance
in your sex life and full satisfaction for both of you.
Some experiments regarding technique or position may
end in mutual dissatisfaction. No matter. You have
your lives ahead of you. Try another way next time.
Maybe you’ve been married several years and have
never developed an open channel of communication
regarding your sexual activities. Although “you” may
be fully satisfied, you must still ask the “Was it as good
for you as it was for me?” question of your spouse. It’s
never too late to learn new things, and you’re never
too old to change. Failure to discover sexual problems
and take corrective action may doom your spouse to a
sex life that is partly or totally unsatisfying. Even
worse, failure to communicate in this important area
may destroy your marriage, much to the delight of
Satan and his demons. Remember that demons take a
perverse interest in illicit sexual activities of all types.
Conversely, they will go out of their way to destroy a
healthy marriage, given a chance.

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